"My balls are burning"

A friend called me today. Lets call him Red Balls...

RED BALLS: Hi, I have a confession to make
ME: Ok, seriously, if its something stupid im killing your dog
RED BALLS: Ok, please dont laugh at me later, i kind of put Nair on my balls last night and it worked pretty good.
ME: hahahahahah Nair hahahah i dont think that goes on sensitive places such as your balls... hahahhahaahahha
RED BALLS: Seriously, listen, so i put some on and it really did work good. So today i figured i'd put some more on to fix some of the places that it didnt get...and i dont think youre supposed to put it two days in a row, and now my balls are on fire!

ME: hahahahahahahahah hahahahahahahahahahaha *falling off my chair* hhahahaah youre an idiot, didnt the first days burning sensations give you a clue for trying that a second time? How stupid are you? What possessed you to get that? And where did you find a bottle of Nair?

RED BALLS: Well, I bought it the other day, and now im in pain seriously, my balls are red and are burning, i can barely sit and walk....I kind of did it once when i was 21...back in the day my roommates gf had some of that stuff in our apartment and it worked then. And now, i was just wondering if it worked as good as before - but i wasnt supposed to try it two days in a row huh?? What do i do...?

ME: hhahahahahaha youre the biggest idiot ive ever known,,,,youre red balls!! hahahahahah
Well, all i can tell you is to stand naked in the shower and slap cold water onto your balls. hahahahhahahahaahah *he was getting more upset with the crazy laughter***

RED BALLS: Ok, im gonna call you back later...thanks for laughing at me...dont put this on your blog!!!

ME: ok, i wont, i wont put your NAME on my blog, but you can surely bet your ass im writing about it in the blog...read it later hahhahahha

*click*

Seriously, i dont know why people tell me things like this. Like are you serious that i wouldnt share this with anyone? Id rather share it to strangers than tell our friend about what his damn ass did. He should thank me that i didnt text it to everyone we knew... hahahah what a foolio. seriously. ahhh... that was great.