DEALING WITH OLDER COWORKERS

Let me tell you. Ive got plenty of stories. But today i am only going to discuss my current co-worker. Shes an older woman of 99 and shes been through it. She is unbearable and shes only been there about two weeks.

You know what im talking about. Older co-workers are the worse. Heres some reasons why:

1. They are truely set in their ways. This causes problems because they refuse to start anew. Last time i noticed it is 2007 not the caveman era. This woman comes in like shes hot shit and doesnt need to learn the way of the office.

2. Thinks she knows it all. Yes i know i am 23, but technically im 23 1/2 (not really my bday is in Nov. But still!) i cannot compare the experience and eras and eons of experience she has acquired. But i know the system and i know how shit is run in the office and ive been there longer than her. And honestly i dont need no old mangy bitch trying to run me like shes got some supervisory hold on me. SHe aint shit, she aint a god damn thing than a mother fucking price auditor. And honestly, i do more than she does in the 3 hours she takes up in the morning smoking and drinking coffee in the loading dock of my office.

3. I will (god willing) outlive her. Shes only got like 10 years left, if shes lucky. And plus, shes a freaking sneeze and fart away from keeling over and snapping in two. And when shes gone, i will still be there to pick up the pieces and keep with my regular flow of office work.

4. Have opinions on things that dont matter or concern them. I mean seriously how is it possible that my highlighter being red have anything to do with her preferring yellow highlighters? Its not my fault you going bling bitch. Get some laser surgery done or wear better prescriptions, or try and place the paper closer to your face. I like my red highlighters god dammit!

5. Older generations think its okay to smother me and invade my personal space. Its a known fact, statistically, that older generations (especially hispanics - oh i forgot to mention shes old-school Cuban) tend to communicate within other peoples personal space. I on the other hand along with my generation and the rest of the American society know not to invade peoples personal space because i dont like to be close enought to smell your hot breathe. I mean have you ever smelled a 99 year olds breathe after three hours of coffee and cigarettes? That shit is nasty - cause her dentures have been marinating that shit over night and all morning. Its just disgusting and when she gets near me like that i move away. I give a fuck if she thinks it rude, i am just trying to get away from you - get the hint lady - you invade my space!!!
The only ones that are allowed in my space are my man, and my dogs...cause in my family we dont even hug - its just weird...

I know you have all had to deal with this kinda shit. And i am sick and tired of seeing this ladys face all day, im just glad shes got her own cubicle and can pick her own nose behind that fake wall - cause if i had to look at her all day i would just die - or realistically quit. Yes people i am that bad - i would quit.
If you havent read my blog before , know this now, i am unabashingly vain and rude and sarcastic. Theres nothing to hide.. Even though i have calmed down a lot i still can bring it out when i have to.