Bringin Back Seal and funny picture of the Month

Here is a video that I had never seen and thought it might bring some people back.

Its Seals Crazy video, classic song...






Funny Picture of The Month



Funny Videos

Arrrgggg

Not having computer sucks people!!! im trying to get my computer fixed...watch out for me i willll beeee baccckkkk!

EMail Funnies

I think imma start a new chapter, i know ive got netflix funnies, funny pics of the month, and now this new one: Email Funnies...but i couldnt help it. Todays actually will count for two though. Funny Pic of the Month and Email Funnies...



REDNECK MANSIONS

Don't Make my Mistakes

Do not make the same mistake I made. If you are looking up a movie in a rush on netflix, stop and take the time to actually get the right one, do not just go by the year of the release because I paid the price, dirty style.

I was looking for that new Alien vs. Predator movie and instead got Alien vs Hunter. Suffice to say that my 8 yr old nephew has officially called me a loser who rents lame movies. I coudlnt even entertain an 8 yr old with this flick. I dont even remember the last time i fell asleep watching a movie before this. It was so poorly made...
Look at the covers, how was I not gonna make the mistake of renting the wrong one?


This looks like the right movie...



But this is the real deal....


Here are some netflix funnies for your enjoyment about Alien vs Hunter:

Mr. Tiddles
I got an early copy of this and man let me tell you how bad it is. The entire purpose of this is to fool you into renting it. The aliens don't even look like they do on the cover. Instead they look like walking creatures from the Tremors series covered in fake slime. The hunters are super lame looking horrible actors trying to pretend they are Predators. The acting is just beyond painful to watch. Nobody can act in this. The special effects are just sad. The entire movie looked to be made for a $300 budget. The worst thing of all is the story which is so lame there's no way you can't keep watching. Seriously the worst movie I have seen. Think Sci-Fi channel movie bad but somehow even worse. Don't fall for the scam and rent this crap like I made the mistake of doing. It's unwatchable.

Tomlet
Wow, another straight to video turdfest to trick the gullible into thinking it has something to do with alien vs. predator. Who makes this crap? Who rents this crap? I did just so I would be qualified to pan it in a customer review (I'm demented that way). Film producers that do this should be tarred and feathered.

JB 18682
Horrible, I had to stop watching it in about 15min. I thought this was going to be, well like a real movie. Low budget, bad acting, and the creatures looked like someone went to party city and rented some lame costumes... BAD

MacHed
Oh dear god....do NOT rent this. This is like your high school A/V club borrowing the video equipment to make a movie over a weekend. Complete with the art department using newspaper strips dipped in paste to make the costumes. I'll have to brush my teeth 5 times to get the taste out of my mouth.


A very angry renter....
TommyC65
What can't you say bad about this one? It has no redeeming values other than my friends and I laughing ourselves sick. Here's the list of bad: continuity issues, writing, acting, effects, sound, scenes, production, editing, soundtrack, and any other thing that can be wrong with movie making. The unbelievable cast is led by former "Greatest American Hero" William Katt, who was just plain awful and looked like he may have just got out of rehab and needed some cash. Michelle Pfeiffer's not quite as skilled little sister Dedee puts her all into her role, I just hope she wasn't counting on this movie rekindling her "career". The rest of the cast is horrid and forgettable, and you don't care when they die. The alien and the "hunter" are so bad , you can't stop laughing at them. We even watched the "special" features- the "making of", which was filmed as poorly as the finished movie; the blooper reel, which you could call the whole film; and finally the Commentary which only 2 line producers showed up for, no director or actor comments. Neither producer had any idea what was going on, and were more psyched when one of their cellphones made it into the picture. Avoid this one at all costs, take my and the other 110 reviews who gave it 1 star at their word, obviously the (one!) guy who gave it 5 stars wants to cruelly make you share in his/her pain. These are the guys who do the "almost" copies of popular flicks like "Transmorphers". Avoid unless you plan to mock.
10 out of 10 people found this review helpful.

My Bad

Oh my goodness, whats happened? Ive totally abandoned my blog. I have been playing too much Ghost Recon on XBox live, lately, its my new internet addiction my bad!

I shall be back this week sometime, im running behind on writing and reading blogs!!!

I will also revamp my netflix movie choices and funnies. SEen any funny netflix funny comments? Post 'em up or email 'em to me. I would be glad to put it up on my blog. I am also gonna revamp my funny pictures of the week to the month, you know, just in case i dont get time in to do it weekly.

WEdding news? Oh so much too tell. Cant wait to talk about that. But to tell you the truth i am pretty much done with talking about it. Its completely consumed me, its getting on my nerves...im going crazy!!! I cant wait for the wedding, its only 6 months away :) whats the best part im waiting for?? The food tasting!! I get to try 5 different meals with my hubby, thats the funnest.

Church Blues

Oh my goodness, if the stress can get any higher my head will explode. Wedddings suck, i swear...well atleast the planning of it does. I got a call from my church that the chapel my not be ready by November. The thing is, that the church got vandilized and got burned down by these two bored stupid fucking kids, ages 12 and 13. They got really bored one day and decided to burn down the fucking chapel. Nice huh? Now, the church is saying that it could possibly not be ready in time and that we are gonna need a back up church by getting situated somewhere else. Its kind of upsetting because i want this church...its my parents church, my brothers and i got baptized there and its just depressing really. I dont understand what the fuck is going on here.

In better news, im losing more weight everyday and im very happy about that. Work is better. I had a situation but it got fixed... hhahahah eeekkkk....

Today was my fiances bday, he turned 33 and hes more handsome and wiser than ever. I got to get outta my house really early and bought him some balloons to make him feel youthful.

Our credit scores are up and i think by October we will definitely be getting a house to call our own. That will be the 2nd greatest adventure yet.

This past weekend we played guitar hero with my sister n law and her friend. we were like 10 yrs old all over again. It was like that stupid gun game on Nintendo and we had to shoot the ducks excitement....it was price less...

This past weekend i got to see my friends new place with her man n baby. Its a great place to entertain, but in a really bad neighborhood, i am worried, but i hope it works out.
Bad news? her bf told my man that a guy died there, and thats why it was being rented out. And while we sat outside, we heard gub shots, it was scarry....
Worse part, she doesnt know that the guy that sued to live there (literally....) had died there, i wonder when he will tell heR...i worry about that reaction..

Better news!!! 5 de Mayo is my engagement anniversary. Its gonna really be a year since i got asked to marry the man of my dreams.... oh gawd im getting Mc Cheesy....yuck!

P.s.


im in deep love mode...

Wedding Highs

OMG!! I totally forgot to mention the wedding plans that have been going on for the past 4 months. Cause, I only really started in January...you know late January when i finally got work. tee-hee-hee

Anywho, my man and i finally were able to book the hall we are gonna have the reception at. Full blown party time.


Its getting even more real day by day. i KINDA FRIEKED OUT TEE HEE HEE After I bought my wedding dress. I had a mini panich attack due to the fact that what i once knew to really really be my single life is finally coming to a close. Yeah, sure, im totally upside down, ridiculously, retardedly (is that a word? so what, if i made it up) crazily, and madly in love with my bubby but.... these days that are getting closer to the wedding date jsut honestly scare the shit outta me. I ask him if hes feeling thiis way, and he tells me "nope, im ready to officially love you and take care of you for the rest of my life". How can i compete with that? Jesus, we are really getting married...

Anyways, my dress is off the chain gorgeous. I dont have any pics to compare it to to blast here, but then again, i cant take that risk. The only person who has seen my dress is my moms and she helped me pick it. I love it so much. I just hope my weight loss is going to be effective. Ive already lose a few inches from my waist and i can definetly see it in my old clothes. I am waiting to lose another ten pounds before i buy new clothes. After that it should be weight loss heaven. I even went and put on my old dusty bikiny for a lil tanning in the loving sun of Miami. This Sunday is part deux of sun tanning time. I gotta nice for the wedding and fix up some of the tan mess i had from last year.

Theres officially 7 months to the wedding and i will be nervously meeting up with the wedding coordinator for the next few months leading to the wedding, and the photographers, and the flower people and the wedding dress people.

This Saturday i was able to get 4 of the 6 bridesmaids to go to the dress place to try on some dresses. Thats going to be fun and exausting all at the same time.

Brides Maid drama

I always said that I wouldnt surround myself with people who werent real with me or real friends. And with life has taught me, ive learned to get rid of those i dont need. So I had a bridesmaid who wasnt up to par. And on top of that i started thinking that she never wanted to be in the wedding at all. So the signs showed me what was up - that and i ran a few tests just to make sure it wasnt just me being a girl and over sensitive. This fucking chic tried to merry go round me and i caught her at her game.

The first thing i did with everyone i asked was a very honest question: "Do you want to be part of the wedding or would you like to just go to the wedding?" I think thats me being super fucking fair. Right?

I thought I was even being thoughful, because i know that not a lot of people want to pay for the dresses or really spend money to go to this wedding crap. I didnt even want a party/reception i just wanted to get married by church and them buy my house. But my fiance wants the whole shabang, and all of a sudden i find myself 10 grand down the whole with this thing. So yea, its a big fucking deal, when you tell the bride that your gonna be in the wedding.

Anyways, I was nice about it really, especially after their daunting text about, maybe not being able to be in the wedding, to im not gonna be in the weddin anymore. Whatever.

Someone told me at the beginning of this whole wedding planning that i will find out who my true friends really are and i will see who the slackers are. Because the last thing i ever want is to have someone walk my wedding and then never be able to hear from them again. Its disappointing and its just not me. I want to be surrounded by those who love me and my man. And love that we are finally together.

I dont want half ass friends. I dont need that at all. So i simply wont have it. Its fine that everyone has their own shit to do, thats totally understandable but having someone around that doesnt give a shit is a totally different. Being at different points in your life is great, thats what makes up different people, but never contacting someone or ever making an effort to show that you care is different too.

Anyways, i was real cool about it, and i told her no prob, i got someone else to replace you and that i hope they get what they wanted.. as per the text they sent me. I wasnt rude or a bitch as i usually am. And i didnt say my peace really either, because honestly i dont give a shit anymore. If that person doesnt give a shit about me i wont make it known to her that i do. So i left it at that. I deleted her from my myspace, my emails, my cell phone, and my life pretty much. And if she were to read this blog before she finds out - even though she wouldnt because she never calls me anyways or picks up my calls, so there it is...shes outta my life. And if she reads this, she wont care anyways.

The saddest part about this, is that she was the one who got me and my fiance together in the first place, hhahah so sad.

I told You So

I been saying for 2 years that we were going to end up in a recession at one point or another due to many factors that have affected our economy and everyone told me i was crazy. But mark my words, there will be a very bad recession - maybe even a depression if we get another republican in the white house. And i will be standing here with my newly thinned ass, and my hands resting on my hips saying loud "I told you so".. you shall see, oh and thanks Bush, i really appreciate it all.

Church Run down

I was thinking about doing a run down on the things that I have to put up with in order to get married at a Catholic Church...not just any church, but this one is where my brothers and I got baptized at, my brothers got their communion at, and most importantly because my parents got married there :)

1. A booking date that is 6 months to a year in advance in order to get the date AND the time. I had to change my wedding date (by the by its Nov 8)3 times in order to get the latest time, which is 6:30pm. I got yelled at by family for even thinking about getting it at 2:30, and honestly seeing as to how many Cubans / Hispanics are attending i had to be honest with myself too and change the time, cause we Latin people tend to run late...a lot... more often then not...um mm yeah.

2. A ridiculous $300 deposit to hold the date and a deposit you DON'T GET BACK!

3. Signing up for a course called "A Walk Through Marriage"....which i would like to add has to be MAILED ALONG WITH A $95 MONEY ORDER) 6 mths in advance....This wonderferous course will be for two days, and to my of course joy, is on a Sat and Sun, (our sacred days off) its a program that will assist couples that plan to get married, to discuss everything there is about marriage...the last day, Sunday, after mass, we get to get our certificates and RUN.

The upside about this? Well, we get discounted for when we get our marriage license for the state. Yeap, we get it $30 off.

Oh and our parents have to go to a gathering too. suckers!

4. We get a handout called "An Introduction to Natural Family Planning"...as my fun loving, Ninja friend commented, its basically a handbook about how to bang my man without a contraceptive and allowing him to spew in my pure innocent body. First of all, eww, and second of all, theres picture people, pictures! On how i can tell "the signs of fertility" through cervical mucus....we all know what that is, but theres PICTURES on how i know the difference between ovulation days and "peak" days of fertility by seeing how sticky my "cervical mucus" is......umm yeah

This is what the handbook says are the :

BENEFITS of NFP (Natural Family Planning)

- Based on scientific fact;
-Cooperates with natures design and treats each menstrual cycle as unique;
- Is effective for achieving or avoiding pregnancy;
- Can be used throughout a womans reproductive life-time;
- Has no harmful side effects;
-Economical
-Values children;
-Requires mutual responsibilities by husband and wife;
-Encorages cuopes communication;
-Fosters respect for and acceptance of the total person.
-Co-operates with Gods design for spouses



Im sorry, but i dont plan on touching and looking at my "cervical mucus" before i chitty chitty bang bang, im just wanna get it going....know what im saying? Strap that condom on and lets ride....

5. A pamphlet on instructions for the wedding at the church and for the wedding in particular....

6. Marriage license information...

7. A book filled with passages from the bible i would assume...and this is so that we can choose the readings that will be read at the church...but they all seem wack, i gotta read through it again. Well, then again, the passages sound better in spanish, the English version loses its umph.

8. 8 forms that will be used for 4 people we know to give out witness testimonys for the couples, 2 per each.....and i have to bring that in...

9. And the big dipper of em all.... $1200 or 1000 for the "DONATION" to the church...

I dont even wanna talk about that so called donation.... my man was not happy about that...

Church Compatibility Test

So, there i was walking to the church i paid 300 as a deposit for.... Apparently Catholic religion/church has imposed a compatibility test for couples that plan on getting married...

Seriously people, i had to take with my fiance a couples compatibility test. And if we dont "agree" with each other we get some married counselor couple lecturing us on things we need to work on. Ummmm, you know i threatned my mans ass to answer the way he needs to answer to get us out of that lecture!

After the test, we left and started laughing at how ridiculous the questions were. Do they really think that people want to be lectured about this kinda shit. I have been with my man for 6 1/2 yrs to know that all i need to do is bitch at him and threaten him to kill his dog to get things to go my way....not in that order exactly....


What is the point? Like a dumb ass test is really going to tell the future between two people in the next 3 or 6 years...



PS:
Dont even get me started on how the Pope took it upon himself to randomly bring in two new comandments ...Im sorry did God come down with a new message and i missed it? Or is this Catholic religion becoming crazy? Who amends two commandments... ugh... i gotta talk to a priest about this one!

Losing motivation

Ugh, this sucks, what is the point of paying a gym and a trainer if the results are not shown in the scale....i remember the trainer said "we measure success in inches not lbs" What the fuck does that mean, i dont wanna be healthy and build muscle, i wanna see results on the scale...ive hit another plateau....this sucks asshole...

Random Blahs

What an exausting two weeks these have been. Talk about getting my moneys worth from my shit job. The thing is, ive been working at this bank for two months now. But i didnt get to go directly into training because the training department was waiting for HR to hire new people so that i wouldnt be the only ass wasting a trainers time, on little old me. They like to have minimum 3 people in a teller training course. (which is two weeks long)

Anyways, i have basically been chilling on 69 hrs worth of paychecks (i never even got to get my 80 hours) the first two weeks it was cool cause i didnt really do anything, but then the days starting dragging and i was really suffering. So i started helping in anyway i could around and becoming a great goafer to these people.

After a month my supervisor thought it was about that time for me to start handling transactions, so i did and then finally they started hiring people and i was given a date to go to training. So last week i began this stupid training where apparently the HR lady doesnt like to tell people that if you dont pass the exams they give you in training you get fired on the last day of training, cause everyday you have a test on the material learned the previous day and then you get a final. 20 minutes after grading your shit if you dont get a passing grade they tell you,

"thank you very much now get the fuck out, youre fired"

Needless, to say i got a 100 on each test and a 97 in the final. So i passed, and the trainer took us out to lunch at Fridays. It was a nice gesture. Anywho - the trainer is only the most coolest guy ever and he really makes you get a love for banking and everything that has to do with it, including robbery stories, so incredible and movielike yet unbelievablly true.

I have also grown a love for money. Not your typical "i love money so much i wanna live the lotto and sip tequilas in crystal glasses" type love, but a collectors love for money and also historian. I mean, did you realize that Benjamin Franklin and Martha Washington were the only non presidents of the united states to be on the US bills. And did you know that there were real larger denominations of money, like the $500, $1000, $5000, $10000, $100000. They were mostly made for certifications of silver and gold and the larger bills were used to serve as circulatory currency with in banks.
Im telling you it gets more interesting as i go along.

President Richard Nixon removed the large bills from circulation as an executive order in 1969 in order to combat organized crime.

Well, you get the point, real interesting things like that. That make me think about how little we are really taught in school about all the things we see as uninteresting, like how currency was created in the US. I really want to also brush up on my history on the US, cause honestly i dont remember what the names of christopher columbus' ships are. And im only 24.....Our generation of kids will basically think that cell phones always existed...and im one to have seen them come into my generation, but these new kids didnt and are dumb as a rock. I think it would be a great idea to teach a course in money and the history of it and talk about how Andrew Jackson and Alexander Hamilton hated each other and fought against each other to create a banking system in the US. Its crazy,,,, i know im sounding like such a nerd but it really is interesting shit.

By the way, the new $5 dollar bills came out this month. And they are beautiful! the purple 5 dollar Lincolns are reall people, chill out. They were actually printed in 06 but came out this year. Cool huh? Take a look at it,, look how pretty they are.



Long story short, about the beginning of my blog, its been exausting waking up super early to catch traffic in the mornings towards the airport, having to driive back home, then have family invading visiting and invading personal space, and escaping to the gym to get away from it all, to only be sore as hell, and then be panicked the whole time that youre pregnant, and then find out that your not by ending the with your period, and then finally going back to work at my branch to have it be on Good Friday and be blessed by a suprise that we leave early at 3pm. istead of 6 pm :) God loves me.

PROCHOICE AND PROUD OF IT

So there I was panicking on my decision. Frieking out more like it. This is how my weekend went:

FRIDAY NIGHT

- went out to the HardRock, partied like a rock star
- got to bf's house around 6 am
-gave up the punani out of pity
- got spewed in
- cried for half an hour

Saturday

- skipped the gym
-woke up late adn frieked out some more
- told my bf off for being an ass
-went home and pondered the existence of a baby at this point in my life

Sunday

- woke up late to go to the gym
- drove to the gym
-called the trainer and told him a small white lie about my mother in law having a heart attack and couldnt make appointment
-looked for places to get my eyes tested for contacts
-drove back home to get my mom and shop for some chairs for the backyard
-called my friend desperate about my possible pregnancy
-drove with her to the walgreens to buy the morning after pill
-talked to the pharmacist with box in my hand and didnt buy it

Monday

- woke up early
-got ready for worked
-realized i am not ready for no kid
-went to walgreens and bought :
1- nail polish remover
2- cotton balls
3- morning after pill

- then i went to work, took my first pill and the catholic guilt kicked in....

I am not technically killing a baby that has been formed im preventing it. Apparently this is how the morning after pill works....
- Theres an egg and theres a sperm, the pills kicks in extra hormones preventing the combining of the egg and sperm. Voila no baby. I am technically not pregnant yet so i didnt kill anybody. The pill is an extra strong dosage of regular female contraceptives like the pill or the shot.

- why the guilt? Because i could have avoided it and never made the mistake and because maybe the baby could have been the best thing inthe world...then again there is no baby yet so....

Anyways, heres a web site on the morning after pill.
Oh yeah, u have to over 18 to buy it. And if ur under 18 u need a prescription. Sorry youngins.


Morning After Pill Information


Lessons Learned:

1 - No more pity f*cks
2 - Always use protection (even if ur getting married)
3 - Just because youre getting married doesnt make it right to have a kid outta wedlock....even if the wedding is 7 months away. No pregnant bride is seen as beautiful

HAve a Very Hillary Day Today...

I woke up to some damn good news. I found out my home girl won and beat out Obama at several states where she needed to win.

I am not going on a political rant because it is a very sensitive subject but i want everyone to have a very happy Hillary day today.

p.s. Obama acting as a sore loser mentioning the delegates votes? interesing....think about that...

Training Day....Literally

I went to my first 'official' meet with my now trainer... all i can say is that my fiance did a damn good job of convincing me to join the gym and getting a trainer....cause mine was hot hot hot hot!!

While he was training me i was just imagining his beach body all natural the way God intended it to be, but with underwear ...


Example of my minds beautiful imagination:
These fascinating men come from Brazil, apparently there were having a muscle man competition..


Oh the sweetness that is my life right now. At first i was kind of worried about getting a guy to train me because im not use to it. But then i saw who i got. And DAyum he has a great body...His face is okay decent enough to look at, but his body is what is driving me wild. I was never into the whole bulky guy look. But when a man is lean and muscular it just drives me insane.

I really got flustered when he got behind me to help me with my 'form' on a machine. It drove my mind wild. I was really enjoying him back there. I made sure to not be so winy. I did worn him though that I am a full fledged complainer and that he musnt be lean on me. And he wasnt.

He worked my arms today, like crazy. I am in so much pain. Its amazing how many parts of ur arm you must use to actually be typing....

So, i got to do my half hour with Mr Rob and then i did 30 mins of cardio. I dont see any change as of yet...then again, its only been two weeks. Monday will be my third week. I go 4-5 times a week and im eating better. Plus, i look forward to that eye candy.

I got to inquire about the tent rental for my wedding. Its at a good price so im happy about that. what seems to be a greater cost will be the actual caterer....JOy.... Im really looking forward to having latin food. I want it to be my culture, not this Americana culture, with fake Italian food and foo foo food ive never heard of that is always listed in the hotels and banquet halls. It seems like things are looking up for this wedding.
I am having problems with the Church, they tend not to call, its like i have to kiss their ass. Fuckers, i bet they will ask for a $1500 "donation" fee. Why is it such a mission with these Catholic Churches?

We got to go house hunting yesterday, my fiance and I. I have a friend in real estate and she got to show us like 6 houses. Its definitely a buyers market, cause the sellers are getting raped by my cheap prices. Im so happy about that. Cause i do no want to live in an apartment. Apartments feel like jail cells; no grass, no room to move away from the loved one, and no space to escape when theres a fire. Theres the window - but im not gonna jump.

"Ya'll are stupid kids I swear to God!"

Maybe, one of the best quotes of the news media lately... On Yahoo!.com theres this story about a kindergarden/1st grade teacher that tells her students that they are "stupid and bad bad kids..." If theres one thing that i learned about teaching in my teaching courses was that once you start losing your cool or start abusing kids verbally, its time to look for another job because you have lost control of your class/kids and you suck as a teacher. These are the worst teachers that are in our school system.

This teacher has been in the field for 30 years, and had the audacity to blame it on "medication".
I am all for negative reinforcement, but for my own children like my mother taught me lol. I wont be that way to somebody elses kids. You only verbally abuse the ones you love lol. Know what i am saying? Cause they will love you no matter what.


Catch the news on yahoo.com

ON A DARKER NOTE:

I dont understand what the rush is for some people to get married. I have this friend who got married at 21 and she only knew her bf for less than a year when deciding to tie the knot. Hes older and shes super young. shes 23 now, hes 33.
she seems to be in this rut where shes bored and needs sometihng to distract her. Unfortunetly shes lookin for a man. Nuff said.. now shes thinking hes cheating on her. Guily conscious?

Shrek in the Face

So i went to the gym agian.



I couldnt find an open ab machine or an elyptical, and decided to use the bike....Atleast i got to sit down...then at the end of my biking i sprinted the last two minutes. I breathed better cause i didnt smoke until after the gym.



I was going to use the ab machine, couldnt do it cause the gym is a meat locker of men and women.



I walked up to the weight training class and ran away quickly. I havent even started on it yet and i wanted to get in the class. I got scuuuuurrreeddd. That and there were guys staring into the room looking at the girls asses.



I got really animated about the spinning classes. I can definetly see myself in that scary dark room full of techno music....



Work was whatever today. I was texting the whole day i was so bored. I had to read the teller manual like 3 times to entertain myself between the texts.



I got to see some beasties of guys today, nice bodies but shrek in the face. Ugh, i had to really jam to my ipod while working out.



Not much else to say...

Total Flashdance Experience

I had a total Flashdance moment today. I enlisted in the gym this weekend. I am full blown determined to lose the 35 lbs i got on me. Its like a fuckin midget is riding on my stomache 24/7. Its bad...expecially when i see the old pics of me...that and i found old pairs of jeans in my closet that i have been saving desperately for my rejuvenating from my fatness and old age. True, im only 24 but if i let it go any more imma be called shamu for sure.

So, i was at the gym and i was totally motivated and when i got off of the elyptical i was dying, my legs were complete stroodles and then i classically made it to the wipy machine to clean off my machine and then stroodle walked to the lockerroom to lay on the floor and stretch out my legs. I was surprisingly not outta shape. The cigerettes caught up to me though. i was on that machine for 35 minutes and tomorrow im going back for more. I think i will be doing some more cardio and abs.

Saturday will be D day, cause im gonna train with the personal trainer so im just shaping up in time for that torture...

Okay the good stuff:

I saw some serious ass at the gym. The guys are definite motivation to keep working out and not puking my brains out from the stress of the work out. I do have to say that the spinning classes were insane, just watching them in that room was insane. They were serious about spinning and working out, there were grunts and yelling and asses in the air. I was really excited about going and then when i saw that spectacle i realized i need to be training for atleast 2 months before i even think about looking at the room again. I guess the first time i do i will be passing out.

The guys are so sweaty and big and bulgy, some of them were old nasty and balding. But then theres those skinny whores who are definetly looking for some action. Fit bitches....yes im hating. But soon i will lose my midget and get to fitting into my sweet sweet long lost skinny jeans. I wonder how long it will take to lost my first ten. Hopefully in a month!!! :)

Oh yeah...work is aight...

My Bad

Ive totally abandoned my blog duties...my bad!!
Ive got a real schedule now, that and ive been partying it up people. Ive been drinking so much that my body is seriously rejecting alcohol, i wake up with muscle cramps .... oh well, i will just keep mixing it up until i find a beer that will not give me muscle craps the next morning.

I went camping for 4 days, and it was fun... i was one with nature and ....i mean that literally...i will be posting up some pics of that adventure....

I bet youre like camping in Florida? But its flat! Well, there is the Everglades people. Real fucking nature....

I will hit that up sooner than later!

Oh my god, i just read my last post, can i be any more negative? Jeeezz.... I have officially been at my jizob for 4 weeks. And i have to say that im really excited to start handling money and really working. So far i have been a fly on the wall basically learning but not touching. Its easy money hahahah The problem is that the training department has been waiting for new hires in order to schedule a new class for teller training, and ive been the only one hired in the last month...

Last week my boss told me they have finally scheduled a class, for March 4th.... I have to admit i dont know what i was so worried about. This is the easiest job in the world. Plus, i get to hide behind bullet proof glass, what can customers really do to me? hahahah

I have done a pretty good survey of my coworkers, my supervisor is awesome and chill, my boss is laid back, my fellow teller coworkers are chill and the two ladies in the front are bitches. But since they are out there and i am inside i dont have to mess with them much.

Its cool. Not bad at all. I just want to start "tellering" ( i just made it up ) so that the time will pass by faster. All im doing now is goafer work and its driving me insane because i aLREADY KNOW WHAT i have to do.

i'll be writing later, i gotta go to bed to go to the yearly art show tomorrow at Coconut Grove... lata!

so im a part of society...

Interesting, i was really excited about being at work, and now I'm just hating life. Starting new jobs means training, training means hours and hours of observing, formal training/non formal training, ass kissing, fake smiling when you re naturally a miserable individual (especially when you like it that way!), meeting the 'coworkers' and fake liking them, fake enjoying your new job, fake loving your boss/supervisor, fake wanting to really want to be a part of the 'team', fake envisioning the mission statement, fake laughing, fake smiling....did i mention that twice? Well its true...

I am a bank teller, and i do a million in one things at one beat of a drum, i have to fake like customers, and fake appreciate their business for the business i am getting my pay check from, i have to fake enjoy where i am...which is a cold cold room filled with bitches i might or might not have to invite to my possible upcoming wedding, and watch them fake enjoy themselves at my possible reception hall, and fake like their possible future gifts...

I think i am ready to change jobs....and its only been two days... oh my god.. does anyone know what im talking about?

I have to train at a far away place.... and actually learn, because if i dont, i will get fired, and then i wont get paid...

i have to go thru those stupid but sometimes insightful 60 day, 90 days, and yearly evaluations, and fake appreciate them for noticing my flaws and errors of my shitty - job - ways, and withhold from slapping the shit outta them... im kinda violent...well i have violent thoughts...a lot...for a lot of people....

I found this poster:




I wanna know what this is about, and i want to be a par tof it. I dont want a real job....rela jobs suck...i just started really thinking about all my jobs...and i never liked any of them...

Lets see what i used to do :
1 - pbx operator - listening to peoples bullshit and transfering them to the correct department/people, informing these people about the college...it was horrible there were more thna 300 calls a DAY!!! In four hours!!

2 - security dispatcher - was actually fun bcause i got to flirt all day with my current fiance, he was my boss...god i love him and the stories he use to tell me about how he would love talking to me while i was sitting down cause he would look down my shirt and think of me and ...well you know ... other than that it sucked.

3 - campus services "agent"? - i dont even know what that title was, but i use to basically escape work and walk around the college campus looking for shit that was broken, vandalized, and needed maintenance, it was honestly the best job ever!!! Because i would smoke out with coworkers, say i was working and not really work, drink on the job, party like a rockstar, eat free food get laid, and still get paid for it !!! And flirt with my now fiance...

4 - "student retentionist" - or a mentor really, even though i didnt get to do a lot of that, i was really good at my job, i called up loser student who needed to return to the college to pass their math class cause they always failed them, attend to loser students who turned in petitions to repeat courses cause the 2nd third and fourth times they took it they failed....argue with them because the rape excuse they used wasnt good enough...even though my boss approved them, i knew it wasnt real...up until the copy of the police report proved real...it was really good gossip conversations though...

5 - sales rep for home shopping network - the only good thing about this job was :
one, i got to see janet jacksons boob pop out on tv live,
two, that i got to buy jewelry with an employee discount
three, that i got to see actual hot coworkers and comingle...even though i was in a commited relationship, all my other jobs had fugly mufuckas....this time i had eye candy and a reason to show up hot
four, that it paid for the first 3 or 4 semesters of my Bachelors degree...i made so much money...
Other than that, i fucking hated this job with a motherfucking passion, it made me so frustrated with stupid ass old mother fuckers that tried my patience, but atleast i was able to make a sale and commission off of old hags and do it all under 2 minutes..i was that good !

6 - medical records clerk/front desk clerk, beginning transcriptionist - i did a lot at this place, it was for a doctors office, this stupid cardiologist office was hell, it was evil, but i got to meet three great people out of it, and i am glad to say i met a real friend there too... i love my Friend,,,, even if she is too emotional for me, shes the caring side of me that i dont own...in my being.

Oh did i mention i got fired on my two weeks notice? whos ever heard of that...after my boss left, the two power freaks that hated me got rid of me...basically ridiculed me...i hope they choke when ever they are home alone, and their family members find them adn tell stories about how they choked on a pop corn kernel....then say to each other... "thats karma for you...they shouldn't have fired someone on their last week of their two weeks notice"

7 - bookkeeper, hated it, hated it hated it...listening to my sister n law, dealing with some whale of tale lady who was the size of a baby wale on cortisone, an old pervert of a boss, and a gay shrek looking mother fucker who i told off plenty of times, and some old fucking bitch that i had to tell off everyday, and be held back from once because i was going to seriously slash her throat....
The only plus, was that i got three parties, one for my bday, one for my graduation, and one for my leaving, i totally quit that job...
This was the job i left and couldnt find work for 5 months of because...



And now...a fucking bank teller...woop di fucking doo....
What a conversation starter... "Hi how are you, oh what do i do? Im a bank teller, noone else would hire me after 5 months of job hunting and about 100 million interviews"
"yes, i have a degree, no im not getting paid because i have one,,,i got what every starter gets"
"No i cant steal money!!"
"Hi i handle money all day and dont get to take it home, how bout u?"

Lets see how long i stay at this shitty place...maybe i am not looking at it the way i should... maybe i should be more optimistic....hahaah who am i kidding lol

Suffice to say that now i have something to write about now....enjoy the next few months of my blogging.

The one where i get hired.....finally

Its true, miracles do happen, i finally got hired. It might be entry level, but regardless its something within my major and i am super excited about finally making my own "chedda" baby!!

I start on Monday, thank god! Theres only 1 big bad news. I am going on this huge camping trip and staying over night for the first time with some friends and i am gonna miss out on Friday and Monday. I basically get to stay for a day :( Sucks because i wont be able to enjoy it like i really wanted to with everybody. But i will be able to share two nights hopefully with my bf because i dont want the hiking boots and sleeping bag and cute winter shirts from Victoria Secret to go to waste. I got these super cute boots and this super cute sleeping bag....man now i regret buying them.

Oh well, I am actually still on the fence whether or not i will be needed to work Saturdays. That will suck even more.

I do know that the first paycheck should be sweeeet because unfortunetly i will be getting it after 4 weeks of working there because of some stupid shit about the pay period im starting to work in or some shat like that.

Ok, so where and who hired me? I got the initial acceptance call this week on Tuesday or Wednesday, and its at a bank. Also, the best news is that the bank is literally 2 minutes from my house. Less than 2.2 miles actually :) WOO oPEEE....but training is by the airport... *NOT GOOD* because i dont even know how to drive to the airport....i guess i will learn now...plus the morning commute is insane....really insane...Damn Miami people!!

Things i will do with my money:

1 - pay off my victoria secret card and burn the hell out of it. its totally unneccesary and only got it for an impulse buy that happened 1 month after not workin...apparently not workin makes you buy like crazy...mainly sue to depression

2 - pay off my macys card...that mother is outta hand, but its totally useful!

3 - pay of a stupid credit card that is 300 bucks, i got it back in the day to help with buying school books, pay gas, and buy cigs, and lunch with. Did i ever mention i was a smoker?

4 - pay off this $2000 credit card, that puppy helped pay for my last semester of school because
i was only working part time during the end of my college time.

5- save save save for my wedding and honeymoon and house. I will be saving soooo much money.





Sucks that the money wont be for spending for a long time. And hopefully i will be getting a raise sooner than later at this stupid bank.

Email Email, Read all about it!!

So i got a funny email today, actually i got two that i thought would be good to share, the first one is funny, the second one... not so funny.


Subj: Benefits of Wine

To my friends who enjoy a glass of wine... and those who don't. As Ben Franklin said: "In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria."

In a number of carefully controlled trials, scientists have demonstrated-that if we drink 1 liter of water each day, at the end of the year we would have absorbed more than 1 kilo of Escherichia coli, ( E.coli) - bacteria found in feces. In other words, we are consuming 1 kilo of poop. However, we do NOT run that risk when drinking wine & beer (or tequila, Rum, whiskey or other liquor) because alcohol has to go through a Purification process of boiling, filtering and/or fermenting. Remember: Water = Poop; Wine = Health

Therefore, it's better to drink wine and talk stupid, than to drink water and be full of shit. There is no need to thank me for this valuable information. I'm doing it as a public service.


Subject: CHicken anyone

This restaurant got closed down yesterday. It was told by a reliable source that PSEG needed to use Amin's entrance in the basement to assist another shop that was having a g as leak, the service worker went into the basement of Amins and discover a butcher chopping meat, that's fine, but he was putting the meat in a crate on the floor (n ot good) but wait there's more, there were 20 dead rats on the floor. The service worker left the site told his bos s and the city inspectors moved in. They noticed th at the so called "rats" which were reported were no longer there. The inspectors then came across a padlocked door and instructed one of the cooks to unlock it. This is what they found other workers doing outside behind the restaurant.

RATS



BURNING THE HAIR OFF OF THEM




When the inspectors went into the kitchen this what they found
WASHING THEM BEFORE COOKING




CUTTING THEM UP INTO PIECES THAT SIMULATE CHICKEN PARTS



PREPARED FOR DEEP FRYING



WELL SEASONED TO TASTE GREAT!!!!

Jobbin Hunt

Wow, can it really be possible that I have not been able to get hired anywhere?
Yeap, that is my reality... I have a wedding in 10 months....a husband to take care of....a life to be started on our own....and noone wants to hire me. Is this truely possible? Yeap, because Miami is the capital of bull shit in work.

I swear, Bush did this economy dirty... I have been on about 30 interviews i think, probably more, i stopped counting after 25.... And for just one bank, i have been on three. I dont even know if thats a good thing, to be called three times to interview, then they throw a bomb shell on me, theres three more candidates...thanks a lot u fuckers. After they told me that, my body was already out the door and in my car calling my fiance in shame.

He has really been good about it. Up until he convinced me to get a new car. Thats right, i cant even enjoy my new car because the guilt of irresponsibility is killing me. Now hes got more things to pay of mine, and i feel horrendous. So i am now desperatly looking for anything.

I have been putting the stupid school teacher thing on the back burner but it just seems hard..i seriously thinking that teaching is what i will end up doing. This sucks.

Ohhh # 101. And its 2008

What up ya'll, man i havent been on this for a minute...but i was rummaging through my netflix, and checking out what some of my friends have on their Queue list, and decided to prevent other fellow bloggers from seeing crap movies... I found this one film called Scarred, and noticed that i happen to have in on my queue, when i had added it there were no reviews. Now there are reviews....And i deleted it. Here are some of the reviews it got . ENJOY!

SCARRED - Genre : Horror

JP Springfield, MA : 70% Similar Movie Interest - 1 star = HAted it

I was intersted in this and at the time there were no reviews. Boy, do I wish there were! This is a waste of film! The acting is beyond Laguna Beach bad. I wanted everyone dead, that goes double for the film makers!Do yourself a favor, skip this turkey.I LOVE B movies was this is more like a Z.

JM 307416 : 58 % S.M.I. - 2 stars = Didnt like it

A child left in the woods to die manages to survive for about thirty years, becomes an urban legend, all while living in the remains of a burnt down house that is (as we learn toward the end of the movie, due to bad writing) only yards from the parking area of a state park. She then proceeds to terrorize and kill a group of campers and an armed park ranger, with just her hunting knife. Why couldn't these poeople over take her? Where did she develop super human strength? How did she survive so long without ever being seen until now, even though the legend of her existance was known? Why was the stroy line stolen from Texas Chainsaw Massacre? Why did I waste two hours of my life watching this?

WhiteFangz : 69% S.M.I. - 1 star = Hated it

A young faceless woman roams the woods killing pretty girls for their faces. The story, dialogue, and just about everything else in this film is silly. I found myself wanting to slap the actors. Senseless screaming, unplausable situations, and unrealistic emotional responses make this movie irritating. You will figure out who lives and who dies in the first 10 minutes and the "shock" at the end can be seen coming for miles. I can't think of any reason to reccommend this one. It was just dull.

blh 721332: 53 % S.M.I. - 1 star - Hated it

Ugh! First of all, this crazy woman without a face should be in Hollywood doing plastic surgery. She has such precision with her knife that within 25 seconds she can take the face and skin of a young woman with no rips and no excessive bleeding. Like others have noted nothing new here and not much gore. Body count? Slim. The rangers back story of the girl / woman is way too long...if I was at that campfire I would have been sleeping before he ended the story. Another plot hole is how this woman is an urban legend, but her home is only 500 feet from the campgrounds. The rangers can't see this house??? Bad movie and poor Maxine Bahns (Brothers McCullen) doing this film...a long way from Ed Burns. Don't be "scarred" by watching this movie.
2 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

TC 157629: 40 % S.M.I. - 2 star - Hated it

The worst movie ever. Really that's it. It's so bad that I don't really have enough words. In fact I can make a better movie with a poloroid camera and a flashlight.


The review by TC, was my favorite, because i think the Blairwitch project was made with a poloroid and a flashlight, and it wasnt bad... lol I like to read these reviews, cause some people get really insulted, I dont blame them. For a lame director, to make movies, with lame actors, is an insult to my and everyone elses intelligence. How are we not supposed to get offended?? Especially when we pay to see these films. Its hateful of them.


Some movies that i am recommending are the ones of seen in the past few days, months, weeks...

1 - Rescue Dawn
2 - Sybil
3 - MAster and Commander - the far side of the world
4 - Black Book
5 - The Lives of Others
6 - Night Watch- part one
7 - Day watch- part 2
8 - Knocked Up
9 - Mr Brooks
10 - Evening - only if youre in the mood for a chick flick